Yesterday our host, Luke, and his wife Whyness, took us out for dinner at "David Livingstone Safari Lounge", a magnificent hotel by the Zambesi river. While we were eating we started talking about the differences in how people communicate in Norway and in Zambia. Luke has been in Norway, so we have both been in both countries. I have already experienced a some of the differences, like when and how you greet people. In Norway a simple "hi" to your friends is enough, while in Zambia you shake hands, ask how you are and ask how your family is doing. You also have a lower threshold for who you greet, so during a day you will use a lot of time learning about strangers and catching up with those you've already met. I´ve written earlier about "African time" where you take your time, and do things in your own pace, if it suits you to do it at all (I may be exaggerating a little to point out the differences), and this comes very handy when you use your first hour on work greeting everyone you work with.
During my talk with Luke we started talking about how we treat our elders, children, relatives, neighbours and others, and there were huge differences. Common for all of Zambia is that you take care of your fellow human as long as you have resources and possibility to do it. Especially your family. In Norway its up to the system to do so. When I told Luke and Whyness how we send our parents to nursing homes their jaws almost dropped. In Zambia you take care of your elders till they die. And when they do, you have a funeral where everyone is coming, relatives, friends, those who live in the neighborhood, those who live in the surrounding neighborhoods and so on. In Norway its actually possible to die without anyone but the people handling the paperwork knowing.
We also have a government controlled system to handle children without parents, or has difficulties in other ways. In Zambia the family will take care of the children, or if there is no family someone else will. You can also take care of someone Else's children even if there is no need for it. For example if someone has seven children and another family has only one, or perhaps none, you could give them a child or two to raise just to even it a little. Luke himself was raised not raised by his parents even though they are alive and doing fine. As a Norwegian the very idea of giving away a child for someone else to raise is just absurd, and if I hadn´t come to Africa I would never even have the fantasy to imagine this gesture.
We talked a lot more about these things, and while many things in Zambia would be unpractical in Norway, we have a lot to learn from the African culture. If not to change your way of living, just to broaden your horizon and realize how different you can live your life around the world.
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